Possibilities

Living in Korea has been an interesting experience, to say the least. You get kids and adults trying to say "hi" to you just to say they spoke to a foreigner. I'm "lucky" in that I look like just another white foreigner and I can just ignore them, but it's harder for me to not say anything to people when I'm out with my husband. Being a black man not near a military base gets him tons of stares, points, unwanted conversations, and even people coming up trying to touch him. He's a much better person than I am about it, though. He'll either humor those people or ignore them. I go Momma Bear on them sometimes, which is probably embarrassing to him. But I can't help it! It's one thing to say things like "hello" and keep it moving, but it moves into a totally different territory when you are getting pointed at or even getting physical with strangers on the street.

There is a phone store a block down the street, which we have to walk by every time we go to the bus stop or go to the convenience store or the bakery or go out to eat. So pretty much all the time. One time, one of the phone store employees was standing outside and he came to give Steve a hug. Every other interaction this guy has had with Steve has been a small "hello." All of a sudden, because his buddies were standing there, he thought it would be cool to go and give the foreign black guy a hug. I wasn't having any of that. So I stepped in front of Steve and was like, "NO." Then I kind of pulled Steve with me to keep walking, all the while giving the phone store guy a dirty look. He did kind of apologize, and ever since then, he has kept his distance. But it shouldn't have to take someone to step in a refuse to be a spectacle to stop people around here from using the foreigners as their entertainment.

This is not to say that it happens all the time. But we have lived in the same area for so long that it has gotten old. This is also not to put down all Korean people. I DO understand that we do stand out just because of our non-Korean looks, but at the same time, it's obviously rude to stare and point and make a mockery of people. The phone store guy example just goes to show that it isn't just the kids who do this. You have people of all ages who see someone different and point him or her out to their friends.

This worries me even more as my due date gets closer. I won't be going out on walks with the baby immediately after he's born, obviously, but when I do start leaving the house with him is what makes me very nervous. We are planning on going back to the States a couple of months after he gets here, but we are planning to return to Korea a few months after that. We have been looking at strollers, and one of the requirements I need in a stroller is a sunshade which covers the entire open area where the baby is (if that made sense). This is not so much to protect him from the sun as much as it is to protect him from the people around here. This makes me sad. I shouldn't have to make plans this far in advance as far as keeping my baby safe from strangers poking and pointing at him.

Seeing a foreign woman pushing a stroller is going to make people do a double-take. Getting a glimpse of a half-black half-latino baby is going to make people stare and make comments. Ajummas (older Korean women) are going to want to talk to me and touch him, and I am already not okay with that. It's one thing to say, "Oh, what a cute baby!" and another to come and try to hold him and put their hands all over him just because of how different he is. Maybe things won't be like that when the time comes, but I don't want to take ANY chances. So for now, I'll keep making my plans to get the stroller I want and keep my child as safe as I can keep him.