So now, I get to leave Korea on Friday. Like day-after-tomorrow Friday.
Let's not talk about how I specifically told my boss that they needed to make sure I could fly on the particular airline they booked my ticket on before they bought the ticket. They bought my original ticket to depart on Tuesday, like I wanted. And let's not talk about how they didn't check and then said everything was fine. And because I am so anal about details, I went on the airline's website and found out that on this particular airline, I needed to have someone accompany me on the flight if I was at 37 weeks or later (which would have been the case on Tuesday). If I hadn't checked, I would have been at the airport on Tuesday being denied my flight.
And let's not talk about how they told me it was "too difficult" to get a flight for the 31st or the 1st (read: too expensive), and I had to leave on Friday. This would also work out for them since it would be before I completed my 37th week, so there would be no problems with any airline. I would still need a note from my doctor saying it is okay for me to fly that late. But oh, wait, they have no openings at the doctor until Friday morning. That means that in addition to working full days today and tomorrow, packing all my stuff (which was going to be done bit by bit and over the weekend), and wrapping up last-minute stuff around here, I will have to go to the doctor, come home, get my luggage, and head right to the airport on Friday. Not really ideal for a heavily pregnant lady. Granted, Steve has been a HUGE help (and will be on Friday as well!). But it's frustrating to have everything pretty much set in stone and then again having it crumble.
Not only that, but the airline I am flying with on Friday has RIDICULOUS baggage fees. Even on an international flight, they charge for a second checked bag. I was going to bring our stroller as an additional piece of baggage, but they charge 230 bucks for it!! What?? Our only option at this point is to try and sell the stroller, since there is no way we are paying that much to send a stroller home (since there are so many cheap options out there anyway).
Again, these are things that happen when you depend on other people for so much (and why we hate depending on others), and we are at the point of trying to go with the flow. Things have been changing so quickly (this whole flight thing happened yesterday), so it's hard to be ready when there is no set plan.
I know this post sounds like I am really pissed off, but it's just me letting off some leftover steam about the situation since it's so recent. I've accepted that it's something I can't change, and as long as the baby is okay, that's what matters. So tomorrow will be my last full day in Korea, and my last day of work!!
Trey is two, baby girl
Wednesday, December 28, 2011
Friday, December 23, 2011
Good-bye, Korea
After five years and four months, it is time to say adios to Korea. I'll be leaving on January 3rd, and Steve will be leaving on the 14th. My contract with the school ends on the 1st, so this is my last week of work. Steve's contract also ends on the 1st, but the original plan was for his contract to be extended until the middle of March. That would allow for the baby to be born here, and to give us time to get his paperwork together before we went home. Unfortunately, there was a step missing in the background check, and we were unable to extend the contract. That would have been the end of it, right? Wrong.
The 3rd is the last day I can fly with a doctor's note, and so there was no other option as far as my flight went. But because the school felt like Steve violated a verbal contract with them/they're just saying stuff to suit them, they are forcing him to stay until the 14th. Otherwise, they threatened to not give him his severance pay or his flight home. We can't afford to do that, so that's why he has got to stay those extra 11 days. Actually, based on the law here, the school gets a two-week grace period after a teacher's contract ends to pay the severance. And they actually aren't obligated to provide the return flight home (even though it is written into the contract, which the owner signed!).
So needless to say, it has been a stressful week (all of this went down in the past week). The absolute last things I wanted to happen were to fly so late in the pregnancy and to be apart from my husband, even for one day--much less 11 days. It hasn't all been bad, though. Steve and I always have a plan. We had three different plans as far as our futures after we went home to visit in March. Because of how things have changed, we have created a couple of new plans. We are really happy with these new plans, and it'll be good to change things around.
These events have also made us realize even more so that anything can happen. It wasn't meant for us to stay here in Korea at this time. Even the most perfect plans have a way of changing at the last minute, and we can't depend on stuff happening for sure. So although we have plans A, B, and C now, we know that they can change and we aren't counting on anything.
The thing that bothers me the most out of the whole situation is the fact that I have to fly so late in the pregnancy (leaving without Steve comes a very close second). I am trying to stay positive and have faith that everything will be okay, but it's hard. We had our winter break this week, and it has been a rush to start getting packed up. Really, more of a rush for Steve to start getting me packed up, since I get tired/start hurting so quickly. This break was supposed to be a time for relaxation and getting excited for my last week of work. We won't really be able to pack up stuff during this coming week, more so because I come home so exhausted from work. But it has to be done. I'm trying to look on the bright side of things and get excited to go HOME. But until I am safely there, I won't be getting too worked up.
We didn't choose to do things this way. We were pretty much forced to, under the circumstances. I have no hard feelings towards my boss, but I am a bit irked at the owner of the school. Although I do understand where he is coming from, I can still be upset at the situation and his hand in things. Just as Steve and I want to look out for our family, he has to look out for his business.
To cut this long story short, this is why I'll be going back to the States a week from Tuesday.
The 3rd is the last day I can fly with a doctor's note, and so there was no other option as far as my flight went. But because the school felt like Steve violated a verbal contract with them/they're just saying stuff to suit them, they are forcing him to stay until the 14th. Otherwise, they threatened to not give him his severance pay or his flight home. We can't afford to do that, so that's why he has got to stay those extra 11 days. Actually, based on the law here, the school gets a two-week grace period after a teacher's contract ends to pay the severance. And they actually aren't obligated to provide the return flight home (even though it is written into the contract, which the owner signed!).
So needless to say, it has been a stressful week (all of this went down in the past week). The absolute last things I wanted to happen were to fly so late in the pregnancy and to be apart from my husband, even for one day--much less 11 days. It hasn't all been bad, though. Steve and I always have a plan. We had three different plans as far as our futures after we went home to visit in March. Because of how things have changed, we have created a couple of new plans. We are really happy with these new plans, and it'll be good to change things around.
These events have also made us realize even more so that anything can happen. It wasn't meant for us to stay here in Korea at this time. Even the most perfect plans have a way of changing at the last minute, and we can't depend on stuff happening for sure. So although we have plans A, B, and C now, we know that they can change and we aren't counting on anything.
The thing that bothers me the most out of the whole situation is the fact that I have to fly so late in the pregnancy (leaving without Steve comes a very close second). I am trying to stay positive and have faith that everything will be okay, but it's hard. We had our winter break this week, and it has been a rush to start getting packed up. Really, more of a rush for Steve to start getting me packed up, since I get tired/start hurting so quickly. This break was supposed to be a time for relaxation and getting excited for my last week of work. We won't really be able to pack up stuff during this coming week, more so because I come home so exhausted from work. But it has to be done. I'm trying to look on the bright side of things and get excited to go HOME. But until I am safely there, I won't be getting too worked up.
We didn't choose to do things this way. We were pretty much forced to, under the circumstances. I have no hard feelings towards my boss, but I am a bit irked at the owner of the school. Although I do understand where he is coming from, I can still be upset at the situation and his hand in things. Just as Steve and I want to look out for our family, he has to look out for his business.
To cut this long story short, this is why I'll be going back to the States a week from Tuesday.
Wednesday, December 21, 2011
Please Stay Where You Are
**Remember: these are my opinions. If you don't agree, be nice. Just as you have your own opinions I may disagree with, you may not agree with whatever I have to say here. But just be respectful. Thanks!**
I have been reading pregnancy-related message boards, and I wanted to write about one topic that is and has been bugging me for a while: inducing labor prematurely.
First of all, when a baby comes, it comes on its own accord. Obviously, you can't dictate when your baby will come. There are medical problems for some, and they need to deliver before they are full-term. This post isn't about those people. This is about women who wish and actually try to make labor happen early because a) they are tired of being pregnant, or b) they want their baby to be born on a particular day, or c) any other silly reason.
These women don't read about the trouble premature babies have if they are born early. They don't read about the fact that their babies will have to stay in the NICU for days or even weeks because their bodies weren't developed enough to survive outside the womb when they were born. Even in the later weeks of pregnancy, the baby's body is still working on the lungs, brain, and other organs to be ready to live on its own. There are women on the message boards who were due at around the same time as I, and they have already had their babies. Guess what? Their babies are still at the hospital with feeding tubes and extra oxygen and what not. There are some who are getting ready for their babies to come home, but not that many.
If I were to go into labor now, my son would most likely have to stay at the hospital and be monitored. I still have a month to go! That is a LOT of developing and growing for a fetus. It's not a secret that I've been in a lot of pain. The last couple of months haven't been easy for my body. I've been sleep-deprived and in pain, but I still don't want to go into labor until my due date or later. Of course, there are times when I think it would be cool to have the baby in time for Christmas or New Year's. But that's all it is. Just a thought. It would not be cool, especially when I still have weeks and weeks to go, to spend Christmas and the New Year at the hospital worried about my baby. Again, anything can happen. I could go into labor right now. But at least it would be my body telling me it was time instead of me trying to control nature. You were the one who got pregnant, now deal with it. You can't kick your 8-year old kid out of the house because he or she is being bad and you don't feel like living with the trouble. An 8-year old is not ready to live on his or her own. A fetus shouldn't be "kicked out" of its home, either, just because you can't deal with it anymore.
I have been reading pregnancy-related message boards, and I wanted to write about one topic that is and has been bugging me for a while: inducing labor prematurely.
First of all, when a baby comes, it comes on its own accord. Obviously, you can't dictate when your baby will come. There are medical problems for some, and they need to deliver before they are full-term. This post isn't about those people. This is about women who wish and actually try to make labor happen early because a) they are tired of being pregnant, or b) they want their baby to be born on a particular day, or c) any other silly reason.
These women don't read about the trouble premature babies have if they are born early. They don't read about the fact that their babies will have to stay in the NICU for days or even weeks because their bodies weren't developed enough to survive outside the womb when they were born. Even in the later weeks of pregnancy, the baby's body is still working on the lungs, brain, and other organs to be ready to live on its own. There are women on the message boards who were due at around the same time as I, and they have already had their babies. Guess what? Their babies are still at the hospital with feeding tubes and extra oxygen and what not. There are some who are getting ready for their babies to come home, but not that many.
If I were to go into labor now, my son would most likely have to stay at the hospital and be monitored. I still have a month to go! That is a LOT of developing and growing for a fetus. It's not a secret that I've been in a lot of pain. The last couple of months haven't been easy for my body. I've been sleep-deprived and in pain, but I still don't want to go into labor until my due date or later. Of course, there are times when I think it would be cool to have the baby in time for Christmas or New Year's. But that's all it is. Just a thought. It would not be cool, especially when I still have weeks and weeks to go, to spend Christmas and the New Year at the hospital worried about my baby. Again, anything can happen. I could go into labor right now. But at least it would be my body telling me it was time instead of me trying to control nature. You were the one who got pregnant, now deal with it. You can't kick your 8-year old kid out of the house because he or she is being bad and you don't feel like living with the trouble. An 8-year old is not ready to live on his or her own. A fetus shouldn't be "kicked out" of its home, either, just because you can't deal with it anymore.
Taking Care
Yesterday was the first day of our winter break. We went to Seoul to do a bit of shopping, and stopped at Taco Bell for lunch. I was so hungry by this point, since I had eaten a couple of cups of yogurt for breakfast at about 9 and it was about 12:30 pm by the time we got to Taco Bell.
The baby has been making it really hard to sleep, and because he is settled so low in my belly, I've been having a LOT of lower back and lower abdomen pain. Like, to the point where it hurts or is very uncomfortable to sit on any sort of hard surface. So from the time we left the house until the time I got my food and went to sit down, I was already feeling like it was going to be a very short shopping trip. I was in so much pain and so hungry, all I wanted to do was eat and go home and lay down. I knew once I rested for a little while, I would be a bit better, so I wasn't too anxious to get out of there.
Because I hadn't eaten a full meal for a while, I was actually feeling a little nauseous. So I needed to get this food in me asap. As soon as I took my first bite, I started to get incredibly hot and dizzy. I felt like I was about to pass out. It was really scary, because I had never felt like that before. I didn't know WHAT was going on. I got a sharp little pain in the upper right area of my left eye, and I was having trouble seeing straight. I was trying to breathe and gather myself, but it got so bad I needed to make sure Steve knew what was going on. In slow, choppy words, I told him I felt like I was about to pass out, and I was really hot. He moved the table over and helped me take my sweatshirt off (mind you, the windows at the restaurant are thin enough to where you need to keep your sweatshirt on to stay comfortable). I got a tissue and started to wipe my neck and face because I had been sweating so bad. I wasn't sweating because I had overexerted myself, it was because of whatever it was that was going on with my body.
Slowly, my body temp got back to normal and I felt okay. But then I couldn't feel the baby move. He's been incredibly active this entire pregnancy, and even more so now that he needs to stretch and try to make more room for himself in there (I'm only five feet tall, so that might have something to do with his need to stretch!). I took a sip of cold soda, and then he started moving again. So I knew he was okay. I was able to finish the rest of my meal and finish the little shopping we had to do. We came back home and I went straight up to bed to lay down and relax.
Everything is okay now, but it scared me. What if something had happened? What would Steve do, especially since I didn't tell him how I was feeling until it was almost too late? I'm pretty sure it was all because I hadn't eaten a real breakfast and I needed something in my system. But at the same time, I was feeling okay until all of these symptoms rushed over me out of nowhere. I was just hungry, not feeling any different from any other time I've been hungry. The only thing I can think of to do now is just to force myself to eat more than I think I need, and keep a snack handy for whenever I get any sort of hunger pang. That's another thing, though. I have been doing a great job of taking care of my body anyway, and this was a one-time incident (as far as waiting till we got to Taco Bell to eat a meal). But it does show me that anything can happen at any time, and I should have been prepared.
The baby has been making it really hard to sleep, and because he is settled so low in my belly, I've been having a LOT of lower back and lower abdomen pain. Like, to the point where it hurts or is very uncomfortable to sit on any sort of hard surface. So from the time we left the house until the time I got my food and went to sit down, I was already feeling like it was going to be a very short shopping trip. I was in so much pain and so hungry, all I wanted to do was eat and go home and lay down. I knew once I rested for a little while, I would be a bit better, so I wasn't too anxious to get out of there.
Because I hadn't eaten a full meal for a while, I was actually feeling a little nauseous. So I needed to get this food in me asap. As soon as I took my first bite, I started to get incredibly hot and dizzy. I felt like I was about to pass out. It was really scary, because I had never felt like that before. I didn't know WHAT was going on. I got a sharp little pain in the upper right area of my left eye, and I was having trouble seeing straight. I was trying to breathe and gather myself, but it got so bad I needed to make sure Steve knew what was going on. In slow, choppy words, I told him I felt like I was about to pass out, and I was really hot. He moved the table over and helped me take my sweatshirt off (mind you, the windows at the restaurant are thin enough to where you need to keep your sweatshirt on to stay comfortable). I got a tissue and started to wipe my neck and face because I had been sweating so bad. I wasn't sweating because I had overexerted myself, it was because of whatever it was that was going on with my body.
Slowly, my body temp got back to normal and I felt okay. But then I couldn't feel the baby move. He's been incredibly active this entire pregnancy, and even more so now that he needs to stretch and try to make more room for himself in there (I'm only five feet tall, so that might have something to do with his need to stretch!). I took a sip of cold soda, and then he started moving again. So I knew he was okay. I was able to finish the rest of my meal and finish the little shopping we had to do. We came back home and I went straight up to bed to lay down and relax.
Everything is okay now, but it scared me. What if something had happened? What would Steve do, especially since I didn't tell him how I was feeling until it was almost too late? I'm pretty sure it was all because I hadn't eaten a real breakfast and I needed something in my system. But at the same time, I was feeling okay until all of these symptoms rushed over me out of nowhere. I was just hungry, not feeling any different from any other time I've been hungry. The only thing I can think of to do now is just to force myself to eat more than I think I need, and keep a snack handy for whenever I get any sort of hunger pang. That's another thing, though. I have been doing a great job of taking care of my body anyway, and this was a one-time incident (as far as waiting till we got to Taco Bell to eat a meal). But it does show me that anything can happen at any time, and I should have been prepared.
Saturday, December 17, 2011
Things Happen for a Reason
The past several days have been stressful, to say the least. There is some stuff going on that has thrown a monkey wrench into our plans as far as the next several months, and although I won't talk about it (yet!), I will say that it has made Steve and I reevaluate our future. There's nothing wrong with the pregnancy, first of all! Everything is okay.
But as far as recent events, you could say our eyes have been opened even more so to God's will. There was a plan there all along, and we kept trying to push back against things that were happening. We thought at first that it was terrible luck, and we were stressing out about things that we had no control over. We felt that people were being spiteful for no reason (which is still the case, somewhat), and things were happening that were screwing with our plans--which we had made months in advance. We had everything under control, and in the blink of an eye, everything was turned upside down.
In the past couple of days, we have had to sit and rethink our plans. We realized that all of this animosity we felt towards the people involved and the situation overall was part of the plan that was meant to be. We were meant to go through this and rethink our priorities once again. We realized that even the best-made plans can be "ruined," and it made us realize that we can never really be prepared for anything that can happen. Of course, we can make plans, but this time, we know that any plans we make can change incredibly fast and there is nothing we can do about that. So we can't wholly depend on those plans. They are not set in stone.
For the most part, we have made peace with the situation. We are looking forward to this new plan we have made, and we have prepared ourselves for the possibility of this new plan not working out how we want. And this time, we are okay with that. That's the point of life. In order to grow and mature, you need to go through obstacles and work to come out on top. You need to realize that things may not work out how you wanted or planned for them to, and you need to be okay with that. You also need to have a backup plan. You can't "wing it," since that's when you fail.
This experience has also made us thankful for what we have. We have a good life already, but as with anyone, there were times when we didn't recognize that fact. We would complain about this and that, and how our situation wasn't as good as the next person's. In reality, we have an amazing life. We have amazing family and friends, which in turn gives us an amazing support system. Just yesterday, we realized that we have so MANY people who care about us and pray for us, and we don't really consider how much these people think about us.
We are also thankful for the options we have. There are people who can't do what we are planning on doing (more on that in a couple of weeks), because they don't have the ability to. This doesn't mean that they are stuck where they are, it just means they have to work that much harder to get those options. We have it pretty easy (for the most part), and we don't stop to think about that fact as often as we should.
It's also kind of funny that I say that, since the name of this blog is The Grass is Greene-er! Really? I couldn't look at that and have my eyes opened that way? Of course the grass is greener! We can always improve our lives! But does that mean that the other side is really all it's cracked up to be? Not really. Even in my situation, others can look at my husband and I and think, "Wow, they have EVERYTHING. They have such an easy life, they do this, they do that, etc." But if they were in our shoes, they would think otherwise. That isn't to say our life isn't great, but it also hasn't been easy. Especially with recent events. There was a lot of stress, many tears have been shed, and we have had to basically restructure part of our lives. But that's what life is about. You pick up the pieces and keep on moving.
It's also a bit significant that everything is happening just in time for the new year. We are looking at just switching over and being positive, and embracing January first--not only as the start of a new year, but as the start of our new lives (I mean, hello, we are welcoming a new member of our family in a little over a month!). And again, I will clarify a lot of this in a couple of weeks.
But as far as recent events, you could say our eyes have been opened even more so to God's will. There was a plan there all along, and we kept trying to push back against things that were happening. We thought at first that it was terrible luck, and we were stressing out about things that we had no control over. We felt that people were being spiteful for no reason (which is still the case, somewhat), and things were happening that were screwing with our plans--which we had made months in advance. We had everything under control, and in the blink of an eye, everything was turned upside down.
In the past couple of days, we have had to sit and rethink our plans. We realized that all of this animosity we felt towards the people involved and the situation overall was part of the plan that was meant to be. We were meant to go through this and rethink our priorities once again. We realized that even the best-made plans can be "ruined," and it made us realize that we can never really be prepared for anything that can happen. Of course, we can make plans, but this time, we know that any plans we make can change incredibly fast and there is nothing we can do about that. So we can't wholly depend on those plans. They are not set in stone.
For the most part, we have made peace with the situation. We are looking forward to this new plan we have made, and we have prepared ourselves for the possibility of this new plan not working out how we want. And this time, we are okay with that. That's the point of life. In order to grow and mature, you need to go through obstacles and work to come out on top. You need to realize that things may not work out how you wanted or planned for them to, and you need to be okay with that. You also need to have a backup plan. You can't "wing it," since that's when you fail.
This experience has also made us thankful for what we have. We have a good life already, but as with anyone, there were times when we didn't recognize that fact. We would complain about this and that, and how our situation wasn't as good as the next person's. In reality, we have an amazing life. We have amazing family and friends, which in turn gives us an amazing support system. Just yesterday, we realized that we have so MANY people who care about us and pray for us, and we don't really consider how much these people think about us.
We are also thankful for the options we have. There are people who can't do what we are planning on doing (more on that in a couple of weeks), because they don't have the ability to. This doesn't mean that they are stuck where they are, it just means they have to work that much harder to get those options. We have it pretty easy (for the most part), and we don't stop to think about that fact as often as we should.
It's also kind of funny that I say that, since the name of this blog is The Grass is Greene-er! Really? I couldn't look at that and have my eyes opened that way? Of course the grass is greener! We can always improve our lives! But does that mean that the other side is really all it's cracked up to be? Not really. Even in my situation, others can look at my husband and I and think, "Wow, they have EVERYTHING. They have such an easy life, they do this, they do that, etc." But if they were in our shoes, they would think otherwise. That isn't to say our life isn't great, but it also hasn't been easy. Especially with recent events. There was a lot of stress, many tears have been shed, and we have had to basically restructure part of our lives. But that's what life is about. You pick up the pieces and keep on moving.
It's also a bit significant that everything is happening just in time for the new year. We are looking at just switching over and being positive, and embracing January first--not only as the start of a new year, but as the start of our new lives (I mean, hello, we are welcoming a new member of our family in a little over a month!). And again, I will clarify a lot of this in a couple of weeks.
Sunday, December 11, 2011
Looking Forward To . . .
First of all, I'm actually not anxious to have this baby be born yet. I haven't gotten to the point where I'm sick of being pregnant. Obviously, he'll come when he's ready. And I'm absolutely fine with that. But, there are many things I haven't been able to do/eat/drink since April, when I found out I was pregnant. I miss those things! Here's a list of things I am really excited to do/partake in once this baby is born.
- Sleep on my back/tummy.
I know I could still sleep on my back, but it isn't recommended (the weight of the uterus, placenta, fluid, and baby press down on a pretty major vein). So I choose not to. And forget about tummy sleeping, for obvious reasons. Because of that, I haven't had a good night's sleep in months. Sleeping on my side hurts my hips like crazy, but the benefits (at least to me) outweigh the downsides.
- Sit on the couch
Our couch is nice and soft, but it's hell on my back. So I've been sitting on a couple of pillows on the floor with my back up against the front of the couch. I also usually curl my legs up when I'm on the couch, so it'll be nice to not have a baby in the way when I do that. Or at least it'll be nice to have the baby in my arms than in my belly.
- Bend over to pick something up with no problems
Whenever I drop something, it's either: spread my legs, brace myself, and slowly reach down to get it. Drop into a crouch and slowly get down to get it. Or, awkwardly bend down and by the time I get back up, I'm out of breath.
- Go up a set of stairs without waddling, getting out of breath halfway up, or having to stop and rest.
This is pretty self-explanatory. I haven't exercised since April (Two reasons: 1. Bad morning sickness in the first three months. 2. Hip pain in the months after).
- Go somewhere without needing to pee every 20 minutes.
We went out to Seoul today for a couple of hours, and I went to the bathroom at least 6 times. I didn't even drink anything the entire time we were out. The worst part was having to use a squatter one of those times. Squatting and pregnant don't really mix well.
- Eat anything I want.
I haven't had a ham sandwich in eight months. I love sandwiches! I've had to make do with tuna, but it's not the same. I want to have a deli meat sandwich. But because of the slight risk of listeria, I won't even touch the stuff. It'll probably be one of the first things I eat immediately after birth, actually. I want a California sushi roll. Can't have that, either. I do know I have to watch for chocolate, caffeine, and other stuff while breastfeeding, but I don't think it'll be as bad as not being able to enjoy a good sandwich with any kind of cheese on it (some cheeses are off-limits, too).
- Drink anything I want, when I want it.
I do drink soda from time to time (very rarely). I have had some coffee (again, rarely). I want to be able to decide to have a cup of coffee and not think about it. Unfortunately, this is one of those things I have to wait until after I'm done breastfeeding to enjoy. Which is okay. At least I can have a cup or two before little guy gets here. Once he's here, caffeine is OUT.
- Run.
I don't mean in the sense of working out. I just mean I want to be able to run to catch a bus or a light. Especially when it's cold out. It sucks having JUST missed the light, having to wait for the next light, and it's cold and windy out. Same goes for the bus. Especially if I could have made it by running for it.
- Ride a bike.
I had a dream about riding my bike yesterday. Since we don't drive here in Korea, we end up walking a lot. There are places within walking distance, but a bike is the difference between a 20-minute walk or a five-minute ride.
- Have people think I'm just my usual stand-offish, serious self rather than think it's because of pregnancy emotions (which actually, is not because I'm being antisocial, I'm just a shy person and it takes me a while to warm up to people).
I haven't been the typical emotional crazy pregnant woman this entire time. So when someone assumes that I am more emotional than usual because of this pregnancy, it pisses me off. For example, I am a very strict teacher. I always have been. I haven't changed my teaching style. So when parents call to complain because their kids are scared or nervous around me (which isn't something new, and the kids are just upset because I expect them to do their homework and give them detention when they don't do it--rather than just smile and say it's okay like other teachers around here may do, or have no control over my classes, etc. . . this is a topic for another time), and tell my boss that they suspect it's because of my pregnancy emotions, it really bugs me. And I can't defend myself without sounding or seeming emotional, so it's a lose-lose for me.
- Have a conversation that doesn't revolve around my pregnancy.
It's not that I want people to ignore it, or that I don't want to talk about it. If anything, I LOVE talking about pregnancy and symptoms and this child of mine. BUT. That's what blogging is for. That's what my husband is for. That's what the rest of my family is for. That's what my friends are for. If we are out just hanging out and you are not pregnant and have not been pregnant, I don't want pregnancy to be the focus of the conversation. It makes me uncomfortable, and I'm sure you don't want to spend your time talking about it.
People, MY PREGNANCY DOES NOT DEFINE ME AS A PERSON. I am not my pregnancy. I appreciate you asking how I'm doing, how things are going, and little questions. But once that's over, lets talk about other stuff. I don't want to be nor am I "that girl" going on and on and on about pregnancy this and pregnancy that. This is one of the reasons I don't overload Facebook with pregnancy-related stuff. Again, that's what this blog can be used for. I do have interests and things I like to do. I am a regular person. Really! I am my own person with my own personality, and there are people who think or act like being pregnant is IT. "I am pregnant. Let's talk about ME and MY PREGNANCY. Blah, blah, blah . . ." That's not me. I don't want to bring down conversations talking about how much pain I'm in, or how sleep-deprived I am, or how unattractive I feel, or how uncomfortable things are for me. If you really want to know, then at least don't ask me when we are in a group situation. If you really want to know, read this blog!
- Drink, go out, and party.
Again, drinking will have to wait a while, but I miss going out to clubs and bars and dancing and socializing. I get SO jealous when Steve goes out. The next morning, I have him tell me every single little thing that happened. I haven't been able to go out in Korea, because there are no smoking laws. You go to the bar or club, you'll come back smelling like an ashtray. I'd rather not expose my fetus to all that smoke, thankyouverymuch. I also miss dancing. I've tried dancing with the baby, but it feels SO awkwardly weird. So I've just been rocking back and forth to some music with him. Not the same.
- Go outside without having to hold my breath or cover my nose every 15 feet.
Because of how many smokers there are here, there is always at least one person smoking out if front of a business. Right in the middle of the sidewalk. Where other people have to walk through your cloud of smoke, since you are taking up so much space. Or now, because it's winter and it's too cold to stand out in the sidewalk, you smoke in the doorway of the building. Which is also really nice and considerate for every single person trying to walk in and out of said building. Especially me and my unborn son. Really cool, guys.
I think that about covers it. I guess this kind of turned into a rant, huh? Ah well. I'm sure there is stuff that I left out, but these are the majors. Here's to my final month of pregnancy!
- Sleep on my back/tummy.
I know I could still sleep on my back, but it isn't recommended (the weight of the uterus, placenta, fluid, and baby press down on a pretty major vein). So I choose not to. And forget about tummy sleeping, for obvious reasons. Because of that, I haven't had a good night's sleep in months. Sleeping on my side hurts my hips like crazy, but the benefits (at least to me) outweigh the downsides.
 |
| Doesn't that look SO comfy?? Source |
Our couch is nice and soft, but it's hell on my back. So I've been sitting on a couple of pillows on the floor with my back up against the front of the couch. I also usually curl my legs up when I'm on the couch, so it'll be nice to not have a baby in the way when I do that. Or at least it'll be nice to have the baby in my arms than in my belly.
 |
| Like this! Source |
- Bend over to pick something up with no problems
Whenever I drop something, it's either: spread my legs, brace myself, and slowly reach down to get it. Drop into a crouch and slowly get down to get it. Or, awkwardly bend down and by the time I get back up, I'm out of breath.
- Go up a set of stairs without waddling, getting out of breath halfway up, or having to stop and rest.
This is pretty self-explanatory. I haven't exercised since April (Two reasons: 1. Bad morning sickness in the first three months. 2. Hip pain in the months after).
- Go somewhere without needing to pee every 20 minutes.
We went out to Seoul today for a couple of hours, and I went to the bathroom at least 6 times. I didn't even drink anything the entire time we were out. The worst part was having to use a squatter one of those times. Squatting and pregnant don't really mix well.
- Eat anything I want.
I haven't had a ham sandwich in eight months. I love sandwiches! I've had to make do with tuna, but it's not the same. I want to have a deli meat sandwich. But because of the slight risk of listeria, I won't even touch the stuff. It'll probably be one of the first things I eat immediately after birth, actually. I want a California sushi roll. Can't have that, either. I do know I have to watch for chocolate, caffeine, and other stuff while breastfeeding, but I don't think it'll be as bad as not being able to enjoy a good sandwich with any kind of cheese on it (some cheeses are off-limits, too).
 |
| I'd probably punch your mom for one of these right about now . . . Source |
I do drink soda from time to time (very rarely). I have had some coffee (again, rarely). I want to be able to decide to have a cup of coffee and not think about it. Unfortunately, this is one of those things I have to wait until after I'm done breastfeeding to enjoy. Which is okay. At least I can have a cup or two before little guy gets here. Once he's here, caffeine is OUT.
 |
| Cute AND tasty! Source |
I don't mean in the sense of working out. I just mean I want to be able to run to catch a bus or a light. Especially when it's cold out. It sucks having JUST missed the light, having to wait for the next light, and it's cold and windy out. Same goes for the bus. Especially if I could have made it by running for it.
- Ride a bike.
I had a dream about riding my bike yesterday. Since we don't drive here in Korea, we end up walking a lot. There are places within walking distance, but a bike is the difference between a 20-minute walk or a five-minute ride.
- Have people think I'm just my usual stand-offish, serious self rather than think it's because of pregnancy emotions (which actually, is not because I'm being antisocial, I'm just a shy person and it takes me a while to warm up to people).
I haven't been the typical emotional crazy pregnant woman this entire time. So when someone assumes that I am more emotional than usual because of this pregnancy, it pisses me off. For example, I am a very strict teacher. I always have been. I haven't changed my teaching style. So when parents call to complain because their kids are scared or nervous around me (which isn't something new, and the kids are just upset because I expect them to do their homework and give them detention when they don't do it--rather than just smile and say it's okay like other teachers around here may do, or have no control over my classes, etc. . . this is a topic for another time), and tell my boss that they suspect it's because of my pregnancy emotions, it really bugs me. And I can't defend myself without sounding or seeming emotional, so it's a lose-lose for me.
- Have a conversation that doesn't revolve around my pregnancy.
It's not that I want people to ignore it, or that I don't want to talk about it. If anything, I LOVE talking about pregnancy and symptoms and this child of mine. BUT. That's what blogging is for. That's what my husband is for. That's what the rest of my family is for. That's what my friends are for. If we are out just hanging out and you are not pregnant and have not been pregnant, I don't want pregnancy to be the focus of the conversation. It makes me uncomfortable, and I'm sure you don't want to spend your time talking about it.
People, MY PREGNANCY DOES NOT DEFINE ME AS A PERSON. I am not my pregnancy. I appreciate you asking how I'm doing, how things are going, and little questions. But once that's over, lets talk about other stuff. I don't want to be nor am I "that girl" going on and on and on about pregnancy this and pregnancy that. This is one of the reasons I don't overload Facebook with pregnancy-related stuff. Again, that's what this blog can be used for. I do have interests and things I like to do. I am a regular person. Really! I am my own person with my own personality, and there are people who think or act like being pregnant is IT. "I am pregnant. Let's talk about ME and MY PREGNANCY. Blah, blah, blah . . ." That's not me. I don't want to bring down conversations talking about how much pain I'm in, or how sleep-deprived I am, or how unattractive I feel, or how uncomfortable things are for me. If you really want to know, then at least don't ask me when we are in a group situation. If you really want to know, read this blog!
 |
| I AM pregnancy! Pregnancy, pregnancy, pregnancy!! |
Again, drinking will have to wait a while, but I miss going out to clubs and bars and dancing and socializing. I get SO jealous when Steve goes out. The next morning, I have him tell me every single little thing that happened. I haven't been able to go out in Korea, because there are no smoking laws. You go to the bar or club, you'll come back smelling like an ashtray. I'd rather not expose my fetus to all that smoke, thankyouverymuch. I also miss dancing. I've tried dancing with the baby, but it feels SO awkwardly weird. So I've just been rocking back and forth to some music with him. Not the same.
 |
| I'll have one of each, please. Source |
Because of how many smokers there are here, there is always at least one person smoking out if front of a business. Right in the middle of the sidewalk. Where other people have to walk through your cloud of smoke, since you are taking up so much space. Or now, because it's winter and it's too cold to stand out in the sidewalk, you smoke in the doorway of the building. Which is also really nice and considerate for every single person trying to walk in and out of said building. Especially me and my unborn son. Really cool, guys.
I think that about covers it. I guess this kind of turned into a rant, huh? Ah well. I'm sure there is stuff that I left out, but these are the majors. Here's to my final month of pregnancy!
Tuesday, December 6, 2011
Hurting
The little guy is big enough to make his movements painful to me. There are times when I'll flinch, because his jabs and rolls are so uncomfortable. It does make me a bit nervous, since he still has a lot of weight to put on, and it seems like my belly can't stretch any more. I am getting more and more excited, though. Just thinking and imagining what things will be like when he's finally here. I'm really looking forward to motherhood and this new part of life. It's kind of funny how when I shop online, I immediately go to the children's section. Of course, I do go to the women's section, but only after I look at everything available in the children's section first.
I'm also really excited because I have about 15 work days left! Although my contract ends on January first, we have our winter break coming up soon. And I'm not including weekends. Overall, it should be a good next couple of months--if baby doesn't keep hurting me!
I'm also really excited because I have about 15 work days left! Although my contract ends on January first, we have our winter break coming up soon. And I'm not including weekends. Overall, it should be a good next couple of months--if baby doesn't keep hurting me!
Wednesday, November 30, 2011
Being Thankful
A couple of nights ago, my husband lovingly put me in my place. Let me backtrack a bit.
I had come home from what seemed like the longest day of work ever. My body was in pain, I was more sleep-deprived than usual, and I started to throw myself a little pity-party. I did this of course, by complaining to him about everything. I compared our situation at the moment with other people, and I said things that I didn't mean in any sort of hurtful way. Unfortunately, my words ended up sounding and appearing not only hurtful, but hateful. It sounded like I was taking everything we do have for granted, and like I want more than what we have. It sounded like I blamed my husband for the things that we don't have. When I was done, I felt a lot better. I had vented. I was done.
But because my words were so (inadvertently) hurtful towards him, Steve told me how he felt. It was an emotionally charged conversation, since I immediately felt like he was attacking me when I was just trying to vent. He had every right to let me know how he felt, but at the moment, I was so upset by how I thought he saw me, that I couldn't really listen to what he was saying. We ended our conversation, but the situation wasn't really resolved. I took a while for me to calm down and think about what I had said and how he was feeling.
As a side note: I feel like we seem like a great couple to outsiders. And in reality, we are! What you see is pretty much what you get. But like with any couple, we do have disagreements and there are times when we don't see eye-to-eye. At the same time, we never really have fights. We have great communication, and that's one of the things that keeps this a healthy relationship. We try to not let anything that is bothering us fester. We try to talk it out immediately. If either one of us (usually me!) needs time to gather our thoughts and then get back to the conversation, we take that time.
Anyway, this is why I took some time to calm down after this discussion. I knew I would just babble on and on unless my thoughts were in the right place. Thinking about how he felt with the comments I had made really let me see how unfair I was being to him. Having him be honest with me about how he felt each time I made the same complaints before made me really open my eyes to how I wasn't really taking him into consideration. It almost seemed like I was saying the baby and I would be better off without him. Now, this wasn't what I meant at all when I was venting during my pity party, but I can see how he may have taken it that way.
The whole conversation kind of embarrassed me, because it seemed like I wasn't being grateful for everything we have worked for and everything we have--when it fact I am SO glad we are in the situation we are in. Of course, in any situation, there are little things that could be tweaked to make life a little better, but then we wouldn't have life experiences to grow from.
I am incredibly thankful for my husband. He keeps me grounded and tells it like it is. He has really made me a better person because he has taught me to be honest with myself and with those around me. He has been the one to push for more open and honest communication in this relationship, which has made us that much stronger. He has also (recently!) shown me how to think things through before I say them, since they may not sound how they were meant to be heard. I am looking forward to raising this child with this man, not only because we have a similar way of thinking, but because I know that our son will learn to be a real man from his father.
I had come home from what seemed like the longest day of work ever. My body was in pain, I was more sleep-deprived than usual, and I started to throw myself a little pity-party. I did this of course, by complaining to him about everything. I compared our situation at the moment with other people, and I said things that I didn't mean in any sort of hurtful way. Unfortunately, my words ended up sounding and appearing not only hurtful, but hateful. It sounded like I was taking everything we do have for granted, and like I want more than what we have. It sounded like I blamed my husband for the things that we don't have. When I was done, I felt a lot better. I had vented. I was done.
But because my words were so (inadvertently) hurtful towards him, Steve told me how he felt. It was an emotionally charged conversation, since I immediately felt like he was attacking me when I was just trying to vent. He had every right to let me know how he felt, but at the moment, I was so upset by how I thought he saw me, that I couldn't really listen to what he was saying. We ended our conversation, but the situation wasn't really resolved. I took a while for me to calm down and think about what I had said and how he was feeling.
As a side note: I feel like we seem like a great couple to outsiders. And in reality, we are! What you see is pretty much what you get. But like with any couple, we do have disagreements and there are times when we don't see eye-to-eye. At the same time, we never really have fights. We have great communication, and that's one of the things that keeps this a healthy relationship. We try to not let anything that is bothering us fester. We try to talk it out immediately. If either one of us (usually me!) needs time to gather our thoughts and then get back to the conversation, we take that time.
Anyway, this is why I took some time to calm down after this discussion. I knew I would just babble on and on unless my thoughts were in the right place. Thinking about how he felt with the comments I had made really let me see how unfair I was being to him. Having him be honest with me about how he felt each time I made the same complaints before made me really open my eyes to how I wasn't really taking him into consideration. It almost seemed like I was saying the baby and I would be better off without him. Now, this wasn't what I meant at all when I was venting during my pity party, but I can see how he may have taken it that way.
The whole conversation kind of embarrassed me, because it seemed like I wasn't being grateful for everything we have worked for and everything we have--when it fact I am SO glad we are in the situation we are in. Of course, in any situation, there are little things that could be tweaked to make life a little better, but then we wouldn't have life experiences to grow from.
I am incredibly thankful for my husband. He keeps me grounded and tells it like it is. He has really made me a better person because he has taught me to be honest with myself and with those around me. He has been the one to push for more open and honest communication in this relationship, which has made us that much stronger. He has also (recently!) shown me how to think things through before I say them, since they may not sound how they were meant to be heard. I am looking forward to raising this child with this man, not only because we have a similar way of thinking, but because I know that our son will learn to be a real man from his father.
Sunday, November 27, 2011
Post-Thanksgiving
I was able to create a delicious Thanksgiving meal here in Korea, so I've been really excited about that. Since we work late on Thursdays, I waited until yesterday to make it. The leftovers today were delicious as well! :)
And of course, there was no turkey available, so I had to make do with the whole chicken. Looking back, I probably should have gotten rid of that neck part sticking out! Ah well. Next time.
 |
| Clockwise from the top: Rice and beans, mac n' cheese, white cake with chocolate frosting, cornbread, mashed potatoes, sweet corn, and chicken gravy. |
Monday, November 14, 2011
Ugh...
I am finally starting to "feel" pregnant. Before, I would almost forget I was pregnant, just as far as getting around and even for a few split seconds, forgetting I actually had a baby inside of me. Aside from the hip pain after walking for a long time, I was good. But for the past few days, all I feel is discomfort with my body. I have constant backaches and hip pain, my belly muscles are continuing to stretch uncomfortably, the baby will press up against my belly and it will feel like a very hard (uncomfortable!) pressure, and all of this is forcing me to slow my walking pace.
Usually, at work, the bell will ring for class and I'll get up and just walk to class. But now, the bell rings and I have to slowly make my way there. I know it was to be expected eventually, but part of me thought that since I was doing so well, I would be fine up until it was time to give birth. I know that is unrealistic, but that's what I secretly hoped for. For the past couple of months, I've also been sitting on the floor with my back against the couch whenever I'm home. I can't find a comfy position to sit in on the couch, and it actually aggravates my back pain. Sitting on the floor hasn't been bad, but getting up from the floor has also started to become challenging. I think it's more frustrating just because I had gotten so used to being an active person, and now I've been forced to take things slowly.
Another thing is that my restful sleep has gone down the drain. I wake up several times at night to adjust my sleeping position--either laying on my right side or left side. When I do this, I also have to adjust the pillow I keep tucked between my legs (to help with the hip pain). It's not that I fully wake up, but I am awake and it does interrupt my sleep enough to where I'm always tired. It doesn't help that I wake up at 9 or 10 and work from 1-9/9:25, since I'm pretty tired by 6 or 7 o'clock.
I'm not complaining or saying, "Oh woe is me," but I do now realize where women who are later along than I are coming from when they say they are READY for their babies to come out. Although I'm not at that point yet, I can see how it can start getting painfully uncomfortable and how they can be ready for pregnancy to be over.
On a brighter note, I videotaped the baby moving:
And can I talk about Pinterest for a second here?? Awesome site with awesome ideas! Love it :D
Usually, at work, the bell will ring for class and I'll get up and just walk to class. But now, the bell rings and I have to slowly make my way there. I know it was to be expected eventually, but part of me thought that since I was doing so well, I would be fine up until it was time to give birth. I know that is unrealistic, but that's what I secretly hoped for. For the past couple of months, I've also been sitting on the floor with my back against the couch whenever I'm home. I can't find a comfy position to sit in on the couch, and it actually aggravates my back pain. Sitting on the floor hasn't been bad, but getting up from the floor has also started to become challenging. I think it's more frustrating just because I had gotten so used to being an active person, and now I've been forced to take things slowly.
Another thing is that my restful sleep has gone down the drain. I wake up several times at night to adjust my sleeping position--either laying on my right side or left side. When I do this, I also have to adjust the pillow I keep tucked between my legs (to help with the hip pain). It's not that I fully wake up, but I am awake and it does interrupt my sleep enough to where I'm always tired. It doesn't help that I wake up at 9 or 10 and work from 1-9/9:25, since I'm pretty tired by 6 or 7 o'clock.
I'm not complaining or saying, "Oh woe is me," but I do now realize where women who are later along than I are coming from when they say they are READY for their babies to come out. Although I'm not at that point yet, I can see how it can start getting painfully uncomfortable and how they can be ready for pregnancy to be over.
On a brighter note, I videotaped the baby moving:
And can I talk about Pinterest for a second here?? Awesome site with awesome ideas! Love it :D
Thursday, November 10, 2011
Eeek!
Oh, wow. I didn't realize it had been almost an entire month since my last post. Bad girl! Everything is going as it should be, I suppose.
- We are SO busy at work. They decided to have open houses, where the parents come in and observe a class their kid is in. Of course we have to prep for those, on top of getting all their monthly work done on time for the monthly exams at the end of the month. I also have two classes in which the students don't have workbooks for the books they are reading. So who gets to create their workbooks? ME! Aaaand, I get to make their tests as well. Not only that, but I got two additional classes a week, which means a very tired and cranky and sore Cindy. Really awesome for my second-to last month at this place.
- Baby boy T is doing well, as far as I can tell. He is a little gymnast in my belly. It's reassuring to have him move as much as he does, since that means he's doing okay in my book. We have a doctor's appointment this Saturday, so I'm looking forward to that. I've been getting really tired at work as far as standing up goes, so I've been sitting as much as possible. Today was not a good day, since I had to stand in most of my classes. Now I have the worst lower backache :( But since it's not an everyday thing, I'm not stressing too much.
- I am slowly but surely gaining the weight I was stressing about a few months ago, so that's great! I weigh myself each week and it's good to see the numbers climbing. I feel bad for those who wish that wasn't the case in their own pregnancies, but each pound gained for me is excellent. So I'm glad about that. Speaking of which, I am already making plans for Thanksgiving. Can't wait to make all the yummy food! And most importantly, eat it! Yeah, so they don't celebrate a Western Thanksgiving here, but that's not what matters. What matters is having Thanksgiving in this home. And what's after Thanksgiving? CHRISTMAS!!! My favorite holiday of the year. And what's after Christmas?? New Year's and then my baby will be here!! Good times.
- Can I just say how amazing and wonderful and awesome my husband is? 'Cause he is! I just love all he does for me, and I know he'll do that and more after our son gets here. So I'm pretty lucky.
I'll definitely try a bit harder to update more often, and will try to not let another month go by with no updates.
- We are SO busy at work. They decided to have open houses, where the parents come in and observe a class their kid is in. Of course we have to prep for those, on top of getting all their monthly work done on time for the monthly exams at the end of the month. I also have two classes in which the students don't have workbooks for the books they are reading. So who gets to create their workbooks? ME! Aaaand, I get to make their tests as well. Not only that, but I got two additional classes a week, which means a very tired and cranky and sore Cindy. Really awesome for my second-to last month at this place.
- Baby boy T is doing well, as far as I can tell. He is a little gymnast in my belly. It's reassuring to have him move as much as he does, since that means he's doing okay in my book. We have a doctor's appointment this Saturday, so I'm looking forward to that. I've been getting really tired at work as far as standing up goes, so I've been sitting as much as possible. Today was not a good day, since I had to stand in most of my classes. Now I have the worst lower backache :( But since it's not an everyday thing, I'm not stressing too much.
- I am slowly but surely gaining the weight I was stressing about a few months ago, so that's great! I weigh myself each week and it's good to see the numbers climbing. I feel bad for those who wish that wasn't the case in their own pregnancies, but each pound gained for me is excellent. So I'm glad about that. Speaking of which, I am already making plans for Thanksgiving. Can't wait to make all the yummy food! And most importantly, eat it! Yeah, so they don't celebrate a Western Thanksgiving here, but that's not what matters. What matters is having Thanksgiving in this home. And what's after Thanksgiving? CHRISTMAS!!! My favorite holiday of the year. And what's after Christmas?? New Year's and then my baby will be here!! Good times.
- Can I just say how amazing and wonderful and awesome my husband is? 'Cause he is! I just love all he does for me, and I know he'll do that and more after our son gets here. So I'm pretty lucky.
I'll definitely try a bit harder to update more often, and will try to not let another month go by with no updates.
Saturday, October 15, 2011
Photo Shoot
A couple of weeks ago, we went and took some pictures at the park. Here are the results (although they are unedited)!
6 months pregnant, and everything is going well. Baby boy is kicking like crazy still, which is awesome.
6 months pregnant, and everything is going well. Baby boy is kicking like crazy still, which is awesome.
Saturday, October 1, 2011
Happy Birthday to Me!
It was my birthday yesterday, and since we are having a long weekend (Monday is a holiday), we are making it a weekend birthday celebration. It all started on Friday, with a special birthday treat:
On the latte--don't judge! It was the first cup of coffee I've had in the entire pregnancy so far. So if I want coffee on my birthday, I'm having coffee on my birthday.
On the pie--be jealous! It is delicious! It's a good thing each slice is so expensive, because I would totally eat one every day if I could!
Steve took me to On the Border for my birthday dinner earlier today. I'll let the pictures tell the story.
Last night, we wandered over to E-mart to browse the baby stuff, since I had gotten a gift card for my birthday. We came home with this!!
 |
| Yummy strawberry cream-cheese pie and vanilla latte |
On the pie--be jealous! It is delicious! It's a good thing each slice is so expensive, because I would totally eat one every day if I could!
Steve took me to On the Border for my birthday dinner earlier today. I'll let the pictures tell the story.
 |
| Guacamole! I wanted avocados for THE longest time! But they are two for 8 bucks here. So not so much. |
 |
| Steve's strawberry margarita. Looked good! |
 |
| My virgin raspberry margarita, which according to Steve, was better than his. |
 |
| Steve's monster burrito. Also looked yum. |
 |
| Mine. Tasted a lot better than it looks in the picture ;) |
 |
| Another shot of Steve's monster. |
 |
| Front birthday momma. |
 |
| Side profile of birthday momma. |
 |
| Folded up. |
 |
| Opened up--side view. |
 |
| Front view. |
 |
| One of the most important features--full-coverage!! |
 |
| Full coverage from the side :) |
So far, it has been a much better birthday than I expected. This is only because I wasn't planning on anything extravagant, since we want to save money for the baby. But I am pretty nerdily excited about this stroller.
Wednesday, September 28, 2011
23 weeks, 1 day
This is from a couple of days ago, right before I went to work. Also, it's the last day I can wear that shirt for a while, since it kept riding up and I had to keep pulling it down! :)
Another cool thing about the past several weeks is baby movement! I started to feel him move at around 16 weeks, but it was a teeny-tiny feeling. Now, there are hard little jabs and kicks. It's awesome :) I can even tell the difference between his movements and hiccups! It does still feel weird, since I'm not the one moving, and it's even weirder that I can actually see the little jumps on my belly. The best part is that Steve has been able to feel him too.
 |
| This shirt has been retired for the season ;) |
Possibilities
Living in Korea has been an interesting experience, to say the least. You get kids and adults trying to say "hi" to you just to say they spoke to a foreigner. I'm "lucky" in that I look like just another white foreigner and I can just ignore them, but it's harder for me to not say anything to people when I'm out with my husband. Being a black man not near a military base gets him tons of stares, points, unwanted conversations, and even people coming up trying to touch him. He's a much better person than I am about it, though. He'll either humor those people or ignore them. I go Momma Bear on them sometimes, which is probably embarrassing to him. But I can't help it! It's one thing to say things like "hello" and keep it moving, but it moves into a totally different territory when you are getting pointed at or even getting physical with strangers on the street.
There is a phone store a block down the street, which we have to walk by every time we go to the bus stop or go to the convenience store or the bakery or go out to eat. So pretty much all the time. One time, one of the phone store employees was standing outside and he came to give Steve a hug. Every other interaction this guy has had with Steve has been a small "hello." All of a sudden, because his buddies were standing there, he thought it would be cool to go and give the foreign black guy a hug. I wasn't having any of that. So I stepped in front of Steve and was like, "NO." Then I kind of pulled Steve with me to keep walking, all the while giving the phone store guy a dirty look. He did kind of apologize, and ever since then, he has kept his distance. But it shouldn't have to take someone to step in a refuse to be a spectacle to stop people around here from using the foreigners as their entertainment.
This is not to say that it happens all the time. But we have lived in the same area for so long that it has gotten old. This is also not to put down all Korean people. I DO understand that we do stand out just because of our non-Korean looks, but at the same time, it's obviously rude to stare and point and make a mockery of people. The phone store guy example just goes to show that it isn't just the kids who do this. You have people of all ages who see someone different and point him or her out to their friends.
This worries me even more as my due date gets closer. I won't be going out on walks with the baby immediately after he's born, obviously, but when I do start leaving the house with him is what makes me very nervous. We are planning on going back to the States a couple of months after he gets here, but we are planning to return to Korea a few months after that. We have been looking at strollers, and one of the requirements I need in a stroller is a sunshade which covers the entire open area where the baby is (if that made sense). This is not so much to protect him from the sun as much as it is to protect him from the people around here. This makes me sad. I shouldn't have to make plans this far in advance as far as keeping my baby safe from strangers poking and pointing at him.
Seeing a foreign woman pushing a stroller is going to make people do a double-take. Getting a glimpse of a half-black half-latino baby is going to make people stare and make comments. Ajummas (older Korean women) are going to want to talk to me and touch him, and I am already not okay with that. It's one thing to say, "Oh, what a cute baby!" and another to come and try to hold him and put their hands all over him just because of how different he is. Maybe things won't be like that when the time comes, but I don't want to take ANY chances. So for now, I'll keep making my plans to get the stroller I want and keep my child as safe as I can keep him.
Sunday, September 18, 2011
Irks Me
DISCLAIMER: This is my personal opinion of things around here. You don't like it, you don't have to read it. You disagree, that's fine, but don't attack me. Mmmkay? Thanks :)
I just got back from a shopping trip across the street at the department store. And again, this 30-minute trip reinforced my intense dislike of shopping in Korea. My biggest irk is the impatience of everyone around me. Yes, old lady and young woman, I am quite clearly in line in front of you. And I was clearly here before you. I'm not just standing at the checkout line for the fun of it. So quit trying to nudge your way past me in line. And when they are wrapping up my purchase, DON'T set your stuff on the counter before I've even paid. I really don't think anyone is going to try and sneak their stuff in front of yours.
The lack of lines around here really bugs me too. Even when they have the machines where you can go and take a number, people still try to sneak in without a number. This happens at the bank so much.
I was coming back to my apartment and the elevator got to my floor. The doors opened, and there was a man standing right in front of the elevator doors, trying to get on even before I got off. This happens way too often here as well. People, it would really go a lot faster if you let all the people off the elevator first before you tried to get on. Even while I tried to go around him to get off the freakin' elevator, he was moving his way in like it was going to kill him to wait an extra two seconds for me to get out.
This whole impatience thing is out of hand. Even when we are going to the movie theater and we take the elevator up, we'll be the first ones waiting for the elevator. More people show up for the elevator, and instead of making some sort of organized line to let the people who were waiting first get on the elevator first, there is a mad rush to get on the elevator. There are times when I have to literally park myself in front of the doors in order to get on the stupid elevator so I'm not left last--which has happened before. One time, my naive self thought it would be an organized thing where the first people waiting would be the first on. I was one of those first people in line. The elevator came, the mad rush began, and before I could even take a step towards the elevator, the doors closed and I was forced to wait until the next one came. Unfortunately, now I'm forced to be one of "those" rude people from time to time.
Before, it was something I had to deal with just because it wasn't ever going to change. But now, it makes me nervous as far as the safety of the little guy in my belly. Because those mad rushes aren't organized. Sometimes, they are a full-out push-fest, and because of my lack of height, I end up getting pushed around more than others.
Times like today, it really makes me excited to go back home (even if just for a few months).
I just got back from a shopping trip across the street at the department store. And again, this 30-minute trip reinforced my intense dislike of shopping in Korea. My biggest irk is the impatience of everyone around me. Yes, old lady and young woman, I am quite clearly in line in front of you. And I was clearly here before you. I'm not just standing at the checkout line for the fun of it. So quit trying to nudge your way past me in line. And when they are wrapping up my purchase, DON'T set your stuff on the counter before I've even paid. I really don't think anyone is going to try and sneak their stuff in front of yours.
The lack of lines around here really bugs me too. Even when they have the machines where you can go and take a number, people still try to sneak in without a number. This happens at the bank so much.
I was coming back to my apartment and the elevator got to my floor. The doors opened, and there was a man standing right in front of the elevator doors, trying to get on even before I got off. This happens way too often here as well. People, it would really go a lot faster if you let all the people off the elevator first before you tried to get on. Even while I tried to go around him to get off the freakin' elevator, he was moving his way in like it was going to kill him to wait an extra two seconds for me to get out.
This whole impatience thing is out of hand. Even when we are going to the movie theater and we take the elevator up, we'll be the first ones waiting for the elevator. More people show up for the elevator, and instead of making some sort of organized line to let the people who were waiting first get on the elevator first, there is a mad rush to get on the elevator. There are times when I have to literally park myself in front of the doors in order to get on the stupid elevator so I'm not left last--which has happened before. One time, my naive self thought it would be an organized thing where the first people waiting would be the first on. I was one of those first people in line. The elevator came, the mad rush began, and before I could even take a step towards the elevator, the doors closed and I was forced to wait until the next one came. Unfortunately, now I'm forced to be one of "those" rude people from time to time.
 |
| This is how Korea makes me feel sometimes. Source: Angry Me |
Times like today, it really makes me excited to go back home (even if just for a few months).
Wednesday, September 14, 2011
I Just Can't Win...
 |
| Leave me alone! |
First of all, any of my weight gain or lack of it is MY business. I'm already pretty stressed because I've actually been TRYING to gain weight and I can't. So when someone makes it their business to find out about my weight, it stresses me out even more. Trust me, I am NOT on any sort of diet or even a workout plan. I stopped exercising a week before I found out I was pregnant (because of a slight back injury and I was taking a break), and I try to go on walks sometimes. But it's hard because my hip joints and lower back hurt so bad, I can't walk very for very long without stopping. I've gotten to where I have been actively trying to ignore my weight and trying to eat as much as I can--even when I'm not hungry!
Second, just because I haven't ballooned like other pregnant women doesn't mean anything. Everyone has different bodies, and as long as my baby is healthy and growing like he's supposed to, I shouldn't worry. When I wasn't pregnant, it was all about being skinny. Now, I apparently have to be 200 pounds. Yes, the doctor told me that at this point, because I haven't gained much weight, to up my meal intake to four meals a day and to have several snacks in between. So that's what I've been trying to do. So thank you very much, but the only people I trust as far as my body and my baby are my doctor, Steve, and myself. I shouldn't have to be stressed just because of your perception of how I should treat my body.
So, yeah. MY body. MY baby. MY business.
Just really needed to get that off my chest.
Tuesday, September 13, 2011
On to New Things/ 21 weeks
My trusty computer, the one I bought like a week before coming to Korea, has finally taken its last bit of electricity and died. It happened yesterday, and we went to the electronics market at Yongsan and got TWO laptops. They were having some sort of after-Chu-Seok deal, and we got really good deals on them. So we are pretty excited about that. Yay!
On a pregnancy note, everything continues to be about the same. Sleep is terrible because of the hip pain I've been getting. Nothing I can really do about that, so I've just been trying to rest as much as possible. I'll try to get a couple of pics up soon.
On a pregnancy note, everything continues to be about the same. Sleep is terrible because of the hip pain I've been getting. Nothing I can really do about that, so I've just been trying to rest as much as possible. I'll try to get a couple of pics up soon.
Monday, September 5, 2011
20 weeks, 1 day
I've made it to the halfway mark! We had an ultrasound yesterday, and we are definitely, one-hundred percent having a boy :) Dr. C. said everything looked perfect, and recommended for me to eat four regular meals with snacks in between each day. I guess this means that although I haven't gained much weight thus far, I should start trying to add pounds now. Which also makes sense, since from all the things I've been reading about recommend trying to gain about a pound a week starting in the second trimester. Baby continues to be breech, but again, because it is so early, he has tons of room to twirl and flip and twist. So there is nothing to be concerned about until week 37. Dr. C. also said this ultrasound would be the last where we'd be able to see baby's entire body at once. Next time, he'll be too big for one whole shot, so we'll see him in parts. Another pretty cool thing from this ultrasound was that we saw all his little fingers and toes, which was an unexpected surprise.
Everything has been pretty much the same as far as my physical well-being. He's been moving around quite a bit, but still will only move and then stop before I can put my hand on where he moved. The hip joint pain is still there, and I've been able to fall asleep at night faster than I've ever been able to in my life (aside from when I was a baby, I suppose). I've been getting more tired faster when I stand for too long in class, and after about three straight classes of standing, I start getting backaches. I've also started getting hungry more quickly, but again that's probably because I can't finish my meals in one sitting. Everything seems to be fine, and it seems like now, time is really starting to speed up.
Last week, one of the moms gave us this sweet little shirt. It was the first baby item we got, so I HAD to document it! I might do that with all our outfits, but we'll see about that.
It's nice because it's a Korean-style shirt, so it can be a reminder of our time here.
I do know that I have to get a shot of the little Nike socks I bought. They look like real shoes! Anyway, until then, here's a shot of our son from our appointment yesterday <3
Unfortunately, we have to wait five weeks for our next appointment. It'll be the glucose test, and it'll feel like FOREVER until then. Good part about that, though, is that it'll be right after our wedding anniversary AND my birthday. So I suppose I'll have a lot to look forward to in a short amount of time. Also, I'll be six months by then, and in the homestretch.
Everything has been pretty much the same as far as my physical well-being. He's been moving around quite a bit, but still will only move and then stop before I can put my hand on where he moved. The hip joint pain is still there, and I've been able to fall asleep at night faster than I've ever been able to in my life (aside from when I was a baby, I suppose). I've been getting more tired faster when I stand for too long in class, and after about three straight classes of standing, I start getting backaches. I've also started getting hungry more quickly, but again that's probably because I can't finish my meals in one sitting. Everything seems to be fine, and it seems like now, time is really starting to speed up.
Last week, one of the moms gave us this sweet little shirt. It was the first baby item we got, so I HAD to document it! I might do that with all our outfits, but we'll see about that.
 |
| Baby's first gift! |
I do know that I have to get a shot of the little Nike socks I bought. They look like real shoes! Anyway, until then, here's a shot of our son from our appointment yesterday <3
 |
| He had his legs up like that most of the time! Love :) |
Saturday, August 27, 2011
18 weeks, 5 days
Everything has stayed about the same since last week. We went to a work dinner last night, and they offered an unlimited salad bar. I had one plate too many, and I was incredibly uncomfortable for about two hours afterwards. But it was worth it, so I'm not mad.
I've actually been able to feel him moving around for a couple of weeks now. At first, the "butterfly" feeling people talk about felt less like a butterfly and more like a freshly-opened can of Coke--the bubbly part of it. Maybe to some people that is the same butterfly feeling, but I guess not to me. In the past several days, I've felt little pokes here and there. It's pretty exciting, and it's feels great to be able to keep track of the movement this early on. I'm sure I'll be feeling a lot more the bigger he gets!
As far as my leg cramps and joint pain, I've been having good days and bad days. There are some days when I'll wake up and be a little sore and it'll go away after a while. Then there are days when I just want to tear my legs off, just to relieve the pain. I will say the same thing I said when I was in the depths of morning sickness, though; this is all worth it to me. I know it'll get worse as far as pains and overall discomfort, and I'm ready for that. The only thing that worries me is my performance at work in the next few months, just because I've been getting tired faster and I'm not even in the home stretch at this point. I'll just take it one day at a time and hope for the best.
Here's a shot I just took before starting this post:
Please disregard the laundry hanging in the background--it's laundry day in the G. household! I do have other pictures of the "gut" as I like to call it, but they are all of my bare belly. And I can only go so far in regards to showing this lovely bod to the world :)
I've actually been able to feel him moving around for a couple of weeks now. At first, the "butterfly" feeling people talk about felt less like a butterfly and more like a freshly-opened can of Coke--the bubbly part of it. Maybe to some people that is the same butterfly feeling, but I guess not to me. In the past several days, I've felt little pokes here and there. It's pretty exciting, and it's feels great to be able to keep track of the movement this early on. I'm sure I'll be feeling a lot more the bigger he gets!
As far as my leg cramps and joint pain, I've been having good days and bad days. There are some days when I'll wake up and be a little sore and it'll go away after a while. Then there are days when I just want to tear my legs off, just to relieve the pain. I will say the same thing I said when I was in the depths of morning sickness, though; this is all worth it to me. I know it'll get worse as far as pains and overall discomfort, and I'm ready for that. The only thing that worries me is my performance at work in the next few months, just because I've been getting tired faster and I'm not even in the home stretch at this point. I'll just take it one day at a time and hope for the best.
Here's a shot I just took before starting this post:
Around the World in One Afternoon
There is a place right here in Bucheon called Aiins World. They have recreated different landmarks from around the world and miniaturized them. Steve and I went a couple of years ago. You just walk around and take pictures--nothing too special about this place, really. It was more interesting than anything.
The Forbidden City, Beijing, China. This was kind of cool, because we had just come back from there a few months earlier. So it was nice knowing we had actually been there.
Stonehenge
This is me assuming Notre Dame?
The Eiffel Tower
The Palace of Versailles
Basilica di San Pietro
The Coliseum
Sagrada Familia Church
Mt. Kilimanjaro
Sydney Opera House
Lincoln Memorial
On the Lincoln Memorial. I got excited about this one!
And this one. . .
And this one :)
The Statue of Liberty, looking over Korean apartment buildings.
As it should be.
Last but not least, Times Square in N.Y.C.
There are a ton more pictures from this place, but it's all the same. Just different landmarks from all over, in teeny-tiny detail.
As it should be.
There are a ton more pictures from this place, but it's all the same. Just different landmarks from all over, in teeny-tiny detail.
Friday, August 19, 2011
17 weeks
Just a little list of what's going on in my mind lately...
- I HATE the word "preggo." It just seems stupid to me.
- Still can't eat or smell fried chicken, and it's the only thing that makes me gag or want to gag. I'm just happy I can eat chicken again, and since fried stuff isn't good for you anyway, I suppose it's better than having fried chicken cravings all the time. Other fried foods are a hit-and-miss. Like I'm a bit sick of fried pork cutlets.
- Haven't had any cravings at all. It's funny, because that's one of the main questions I get asked. I feel weird saying I don't and haven't had any cravings, but that's the way it is, and I'm not going to lie.
- I'm finally getting my appetite back. In the past four months, I've only gained 5 pounds. The main reasons for that are 1) I had such bad morning sickness (mostly nausea and dry heaving, with very little vomiting) I couldn't eat very much, and 2) I haven't had much of an appetite. This lack of a weight gain had me worried for a while, but the doctor reassured me that everything was okay. I'm not underweight, and as long as I am able to eat a healthful and balanced diet, I'll be okay. At the same time, even though I have been able to eat normally for about a week or two, I fill up pretty fast. I know this has to do with the change in my digestion from the pregnancy, but it does make me wonder at the pregnant women who do eat a ton. Aren't they uncomfortable after they eat? I get bloated even after a small meal. I know every woman is different, but I wonder.
- Sleep has been a struggle for me. I'm one of those people who sleeps like a rock. I'm a night person, and I am used to going to bed between 1 and 2 am. Now, I'm lucky if I can stay up past 11. I've also always been that person who can sleep from 2 am 'till 2pm. Seriously. But now, I'll wake up at 3 or 4 am, go to the bathroom, fall asleep, and be up for good by 7:30-8am. I've been learning to deal with this sleep deprivation (at least that's what it feels like!), but it makes for a grouchy Cindy.
- One of the reasons for my lack of sleep is having to get up at night to pee. I've stopped drinking water at about 10pm, to allow myself to go before I go to bed. That hasn't helped much, but maybe it needs time to kick in. This didn't start until about two weeks ago, by the way.
- Another reason for my sleep being interrupted is leg pain/leg cramps. My calves have been cramping up really bad, to where the pain will wake me from a deep sleep. It hurts!
- Hip joint pain is another wonderful part of pregnancy. I found out that this hormone called relaxin, which helps to give the ligaments in my pelvic area the flexibility they'll need in the birth process, is what is making my hips hurt so bad in the mornings. The pain started this Monday morning. The worst of it was this morning. It even hurt to walk.
- Another lovely "side effect" of pregnancy is shortness of breath. I feel like I've never exercised in my life! I'll be walking and talking, and need to stop in the middle of a sentence to catch my breath.
- Steve is AMAZING. He is so loving and patient and takes such good care of me! We went shopping for groceries and we took our backpacks so we wouldn't have to buy grocery bags. After we checked out, I put the heaviest stuff in his bag and I put less than eight pounds worth into mine. Quick as lightning, he grabbed both his bag and my bag and put them on and said, "You go put the cart away and grab the umbrellas (It had been raining)." Then he walked away. I got REALLY upset and met up with him at the light. I said, "Just because I'm pregnant doesn't make me disabled." He looked at me and said, "Cindy, why are you so upset?" He went on to say that this was the LEAST he could do. He said he felt so helpless sometimes, seeing me sick with morning sickness and then my latest round of pains and being so tired. He just wanted to take that load of my back and do what he could for me and the baby. Then I felt bad because he was absolutely right, and he was just trying to be a good husband. So yeah, I have an awesome husband and I love him :)
And here it the latest shot of our little boy. This was him at our last appointment: 16 weeks.
- I HATE the word "preggo." It just seems stupid to me.
- Still can't eat or smell fried chicken, and it's the only thing that makes me gag or want to gag. I'm just happy I can eat chicken again, and since fried stuff isn't good for you anyway, I suppose it's better than having fried chicken cravings all the time. Other fried foods are a hit-and-miss. Like I'm a bit sick of fried pork cutlets.
- Haven't had any cravings at all. It's funny, because that's one of the main questions I get asked. I feel weird saying I don't and haven't had any cravings, but that's the way it is, and I'm not going to lie.
- I'm finally getting my appetite back. In the past four months, I've only gained 5 pounds. The main reasons for that are 1) I had such bad morning sickness (mostly nausea and dry heaving, with very little vomiting) I couldn't eat very much, and 2) I haven't had much of an appetite. This lack of a weight gain had me worried for a while, but the doctor reassured me that everything was okay. I'm not underweight, and as long as I am able to eat a healthful and balanced diet, I'll be okay. At the same time, even though I have been able to eat normally for about a week or two, I fill up pretty fast. I know this has to do with the change in my digestion from the pregnancy, but it does make me wonder at the pregnant women who do eat a ton. Aren't they uncomfortable after they eat? I get bloated even after a small meal. I know every woman is different, but I wonder.
- Sleep has been a struggle for me. I'm one of those people who sleeps like a rock. I'm a night person, and I am used to going to bed between 1 and 2 am. Now, I'm lucky if I can stay up past 11. I've also always been that person who can sleep from 2 am 'till 2pm. Seriously. But now, I'll wake up at 3 or 4 am, go to the bathroom, fall asleep, and be up for good by 7:30-8am. I've been learning to deal with this sleep deprivation (at least that's what it feels like!), but it makes for a grouchy Cindy.
- One of the reasons for my lack of sleep is having to get up at night to pee. I've stopped drinking water at about 10pm, to allow myself to go before I go to bed. That hasn't helped much, but maybe it needs time to kick in. This didn't start until about two weeks ago, by the way.
- Another reason for my sleep being interrupted is leg pain/leg cramps. My calves have been cramping up really bad, to where the pain will wake me from a deep sleep. It hurts!
- Hip joint pain is another wonderful part of pregnancy. I found out that this hormone called relaxin, which helps to give the ligaments in my pelvic area the flexibility they'll need in the birth process, is what is making my hips hurt so bad in the mornings. The pain started this Monday morning. The worst of it was this morning. It even hurt to walk.
- Another lovely "side effect" of pregnancy is shortness of breath. I feel like I've never exercised in my life! I'll be walking and talking, and need to stop in the middle of a sentence to catch my breath.
- Steve is AMAZING. He is so loving and patient and takes such good care of me! We went shopping for groceries and we took our backpacks so we wouldn't have to buy grocery bags. After we checked out, I put the heaviest stuff in his bag and I put less than eight pounds worth into mine. Quick as lightning, he grabbed both his bag and my bag and put them on and said, "You go put the cart away and grab the umbrellas (It had been raining)." Then he walked away. I got REALLY upset and met up with him at the light. I said, "Just because I'm pregnant doesn't make me disabled." He looked at me and said, "Cindy, why are you so upset?" He went on to say that this was the LEAST he could do. He said he felt so helpless sometimes, seeing me sick with morning sickness and then my latest round of pains and being so tired. He just wanted to take that load of my back and do what he could for me and the baby. Then I felt bad because he was absolutely right, and he was just trying to be a good husband. So yeah, I have an awesome husband and I love him :)
Saturday, August 13, 2011
It's a
BOY!!!!
We found out yesterday and couldn't be more excited. And maybe I did buy a couple of little onesies? And maybe I did buy a little pair of socks? Can't help it!
We found out yesterday and couldn't be more excited. And maybe I did buy a couple of little onesies? And maybe I did buy a little pair of socks? Can't help it!
Monday, August 8, 2011
Early Riser
Without fail, I've been getting up at about 8 each morning. This wouldn't be bad if everything around here opened at that time. Most places within a 5-minute walk don't open until 10-10:30, and so I feel like I can't get anything done. I'm used to sleeping in, and another downside to waking up this early is that I've been going to bed between 10:30 and 11:30 every night. Again, this wouldn't be bad if I worked normal hours. Because I kind of trained my body to have eight hours of sleep each night, I used to go to bed at about 1 a.m. and wake up at 9, maybe 9:30. I don't even work until 1 p.m., and get off between 9 and 9:25. So it also makes it hard to really relax after work, since I'm ready for bed right when I get home. I know a big part of it is the fact that I have to be on my feet most of the day to teach, and that makes me more tired. But it's just annoying to me. I know it's a little thing to be upset about, but it makes for long work weeks.
Saturday, July 30, 2011
Steve's Video
Here's the video Steve made at our 12 week 7 day visit. At this point, the heartbeat was a good and healthy 161 beats per minute.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)